I have always said I live life as a open book, if ask about my depression I will tell you about it. I feel like I was given a responsibility to bring a voice to depression, to the fact that you can treat it, that you should and need to treat it, that you can live with it, and that it doesn’t have to run/ruin your life. I have written my blog and had people reach out to me on their dark days, I believe this is because I have opened up about my dark days, middle of the road days and amazing days. I have talked about my family, friends and some of the hard times we have faced. However in the past I have wrote my blog in a censored way.
What!?!?!?! Censored you say? I thought you just said open book??? Hang in there with me for a minute my friends. There are certain people that were in my life who didn’t want me to tell parts of my life, for fear of the way they would look. I didn’t start this blog to make other people look bad, or to hurt other people. In order to tell my story, my life, I have to tell it all, the good, the bad and the in between. I started this blog to put my thoughts down, and in hopes that my thoughts may connect with someone else and help them if they were struggling.
I have realized now at this point in my journey it is truly important to stop being silenced. Stop allowing other people to censor me, to speak up, speak out and for all the same reasons I was before. There may be one person who hears my thoughts, my life story, my struggles and finds strength in that, or simply comfort in knowing they are not alone. I can not tell my life story without speaking about my life. Maybe my words leads a person to reaching out for help. Any of these above reasons are the exact reasons why my blog is going to be active again and UNCENSORED!
From here on out not only am I promising to be a open book but I am no longer going to censor what I say in fear of the people who have threatened me, harassed me and caused me more pain then I ever should have given them the power to do.
So with all that being said, I don’t intend to bash anyone on my blog, that has never been who I am as a person but I do plan to begin to tell my story, from the beginning and set myself free from the chains that have held me down for most of my life.
Why choose to do this now? I have been on a journey for about 3 years finding myself, the real me. Not a me that was told to be a certain way, or a me that was trying to be perfect in every single way and ending up in panic attacks because perfection is not reasonable. The me that laughs, and loves with everything I have, the me who helps others just to see them smile and lives life to the fullest with nothing and no one holding me back.
Coming to the blog soon will be a series of thoughts, clips of moments in my life, and lessons I have taken away from the past and learned along my way. As always I apologize for taking a break from writing but I truly believe I have grown so much and have a lot more to share thanks to that break. 🙂
Love others as you would love yourself but remember to love yourself as much as you would love others.
Live, Laugh, Love